will loan you books indefinitely.

always knows how to get at the information you need when you yourself are Completely and Utterly Flummoxed.

watches more television than you do.

loves cupcakes and cake candy.

checks your blog daily and even reads old posts twice and three times when there’s nothing new there because she really loves your writing.

has a home that you find Immensely Comforting.

introduces you to Target.

doesn’t laugh at you when you are (surprisingly) Really and Inexplicably saddened by the sudden death of JFK, Jr.

can really make you laugh.

calls you every day when you are suddenly at home with a newborn and everything seems so new and you are more frightened of it all than you realize and the only local family you had just moved to Alaska.

encourages you to apply to grad school.

allows her children to watch more television than you let your children watch.

starts a blog before you do and so Gives You Courage to try it.

can make you laugh at yourself.

lets you be the caregiver for her six-month-old son even after you (accidentally) lock him in an overheating car in North Carolina on an August afternoon or (accidentally) lose control of his stroller so that he goes over a bit of a Drop and the stroller ends up upside down (and he is unhurt).

frequently makes comments in your blog because she knows that makes you feel good.

decides to start a book club and invites you to join.

organizes said book club so that it meets (somewhat) regularly.

secretly believes that Oprah is the anti-Christ.

forgives you for missing her joke because you were so self-absorbed at the moment she uttered it.

has Incredibly Cool paint colors in her house.

invites your book club to the Festival of Faith and Writing at Calvin College and organizes the trip completely and even lends you money for tuition.

has unwavering faith in God even when He appears to be up to No Good.

likes salty things just as much as you do and so always has chips around.

makes you feel like you might actually be a wonderful and even exceptional person.

isn’t offended when you use colorful language because you are being vehement.

listens while you hash out the same struggles again and again and again.

listens while you talk about writing a book.

listens while you talk about writing the book you are writing.

doesn’t wonder why the heck you don’t just finish the book already for Pete’s sake.

thinks that the things you have been doing of late are really overwhelming and so of course it would be fine and even appropriate to get an extension for your Masters thesis.

introduces you to bratwurst.

has children that you truly truly love Very Nearly As Much as you love your own.

will meet you for coffee at any time.

will come over before your child’s birthday party to help you prepare or stay during the party to help you survive.

has soda that Isn’t Diet.

forgives you (again) for being late.

holds a slumber party for her fortieth birthday.

is a wonderful and exceptional person whom you are grateful to know and even more grateful to consider one of your Very Best Friends in the Entire World.

Happy Birthday, Beth. I am So Glad you Are.