I am a Yankee. When I meet people, this is what I say: “Nice to meet you.”
Or, if the pleasantries are at an end and we are about to go our separate ways, I say: “It was nice meeting you.”
Okay, sometimes I vary this. If I really enjoy meeting someone, I will say, “It was a pleasure meeting you,” and I mean it.
But here’s what they say in the south: “Nice to see you.”
Did you catch that little difference, there? It’s the verb. “See” as opposed to “meet.”
I take issue with this.
Here’s my thought. If you’ve just met someone for the first time, How Do You Know that it’s nice to see him? Doesn’t the seeing imply longevity of some kind? Doesn’t it imply a relationship? That the Other in this equation, the one to whom the speaker is speaking, is a Known Quantity?
You can only know that it is nice to see someone if you know, in the seeing, what it is you are getting into. I mean, let’s be frank. We all know people– as kind and gracious as we try to be– who are Not Nice To See. Everyone has a at least a little handful, right? of people whom they would, given the decent opportunity, Really Rather Avoid.
It is Not Nice to see Just Anyone.
But when you’ve only just met someone, how can you know this? I mean, it might be nice to see them, but in what way? Does seeing a person, in this only-just-have-met-you situation, imply then that one’s physical appearance is pleasant? or is, at the very least, not repulsive? The subtext of “nice to see you” says: Yeah, you were easy on the eyes or Hey, not nearly as offensive as some people I’ve seen. I mean, what more do they know about you??
Okay, maybe they know more. Your comportment, your tone, your manners were pleasant. In which case, “Nice to meet you,” means exactly that: This initial interview, in behavior, tone and manner, were tolerable and, in fact, not unpleasant, and, perhaps, favorable.
Yes, yes. There is more. It is possible, I’ll admit, that somehow, in that first meeting, you had some Really Stellar conversation (possible, but not likely), so that maybe you come away feeling as if you may have Established Something.
But still, you’ve only just met him. So you say, “It was a pleasure meeting you.”
Not seeing. Not ever seeing.
People who say, “Nice to see you” upon first meeting someone are Wrong. And they may, moreoever, be Lying.
(Sad, isn’t it? I know. Why do I trouble myself with this kind of thing? Why do I let semantics of this nature plague my mind? What, in truth, is my problem?
Answer: I Can’t Help Myself.)
