On Saturday evening, Bill and I attended the North Carolina Singer-Songwriter Final Competition. We did this because our friend, Karl Ruch, was one of the eight finalists. He was the best one. He really was. And we knew this before we heard the others perform, but his performance confirmed it anyway.
He did not win, and that is the way it goes so much of the time, isn’t it? He deserved to win, he should have won. He did not. But he had a great time, and we did, too. And his music isn’t about winning, anyway.
We bought his c.d. that night. Why we didn’t have it until then I cannot say, but it was an egregious error, remedied Saturday evening. As soon as I saw it there, lying on the display table with recordings from the other artists, I knew we had to buy it Immediately. And not just because it’s Karl, and not just because it’s good. I wanted to buy it because I wanted to be reminded of what I believe by listening to what Karl believes.
I am helped by this kind of thing a lot in my faith. I know that He is real and alive and doing things. I see Him, by some grace, in my life with an increasingly breath-taking frequency. But then there are the times when I think that what we believe is really just an outrage, just a myth, just a convenience.
So I knew I had to have Karl’s c.d., so that I could hear from my brother’s voice and guitar what his experience is and has been. I wanted to hear him talk about this One we’ve staked our lives on, and to find, again, that this one is indeed The One, the One and the Same.
The c.d. is called a long time coming, and track 5 is my favorite. I’ve played it again and again; the children and I have begun to sing along. The music is lovely, played solely by Karl’s guitar, played with a slight hesitation, as is appropriate if one is actually praying these words. Here they are:
You say it will be easy
you say I should follow you
you say I won’t have a problem
that you can’t pull me through
I hear you say that I should come to you
then you say to count the cost
you say your burden will be easy
but your burden is a cross
What you say is so confusing
what you say I could never do
I don’t wanna be a martyr
but I wanna be like you
The price I pay is nothing
this life I live is yours
I know the future holds my glory
but I’m so scared of what I’m asking for
I’m asking
Let me join you in your sorrows
let me join you in your pain
if I wanna save my life, I’ll lose it
and if I lose it, I will find it again
let me have the strength to suffer well
but let me ask for this one thing
when I go to lose my life for you
let your presence go all the way
with me
www.karlruch.com
