They say the pen is mightier than the sword; but is the keyboard mightier than the basketball? I do not deceive myself: I know it isn’t. Still, I will employ this slight means, and I will say what I want to say.
I acknowledge (how can I not?) that the UNC Tarheels defeated the Duke Blue Devils last night, that they did it Soundly (well, a small margin is sound enough), and that they did so (Horrors!) within the compelling and intimidating mania of Cameron Stadium.
I acknowledge it.
But here is the news for you: the fact that your team won Does Not Make You A Better Person. Your means, your existence, your raison d’etre (and I use French here because it might sound more convincing) Is Not Enhanced by Duke’s defeat. You might think you are better off, you might actually feel better about things, you might think– in your delusion– that somehow in in defeating Duke, good triumphed over evil. But take an honest look about you: Nothing Has Changed.
Basketball is Just A Game.
So go ahead. Wear your smug smile. Exchange high-fives with others wearing that mealy powder blue. Continue to look down on Duke, to disdain their game, to feel justified in your harsh criticism of Coach K.
For my part, I am Glad to be out of town and glad to be going even further out of town where (gasp!) UNC has probably never even been heard of (Yes, there are such places). Yes, I am glad to be Far Away, and I hope that, by the time I return, the vain glories of your deception will have dimmed in the reality of the everyday.
What are my chances?
Oh, what the heck: Congratulations!! Coach Williams (and this, really, is the only explanation) Rocks.
